Be careful what you say or pay the price
When you think about it, some really serious statements are used rather loosely:
- I could kill that guy.
- That’s the worst I’ve ever seen.
- I’ll be praying for you.
- I’ll never speak to you again.
- If I walk out that door, I’m never coming back.
- This cannot be forgiven.
I’ll bet most people can remember using one or more of these sayings in the heat of an argument and later regretting being so severe, but never taking them back or apologizing. And they probably should have. The words were probably only scratching the surface; there was more there than the simple words.
When I observe people, I have a habit of listening for what they don’t say, what lies beneath the words. And most of the time, I discern a little, insecure voice that is looking for a signal from the listener that says, “Hey, you’re pretty smart.” Most want acknowledgment that reassures their message is clear, understood, and appreciated.
This desperation for words to be respected seems to increase with age. As people age, their opinions are often marginalized, and they tend to start each sentence with an angry, “You kids today don’t know, don’t appreciate, don’t listen.” They are begging for the credibility they once had but no longer do. I’m only 58 and can already see my grandsons glaze over when I start talking about my “robust investment portfolio of the 1980s.”
Sure, it’s part of the natural progression of life, but it doesn’t make it any more attractive. Losing credibility is a painful and disheartening thing.
