Photo Credit: © Dreamtime
When I have my sentimental moments, few emotions remain as real as do significant separations. I can recall vivid details of the last day of grade school, the last day of high school, the last day of college. I remember exactly where I was standing and what I was wearing the moment my dad closed his eyes for the last time. As the drummer in many orchestras and bands, and as a participant in many plays and theater events, I remember the last performances. Taking a kid to college, watching a friend retire, helping a close friend pack to move away--these moments lay heavy on one's heart.
We pile up statistics about the effects of single-parent homes and the results of divorce on kids, but we don't weave the idea of separation and its effects into our strategies for improvement. Why not? So many of our anti-drug campaigns are about what one shouldn't do. Now that our president's wife is telling kids what they should and shouldn't eat, there are more commercials and ads telling kids what they should and shouldn't do. Lazy Americans are told to get up and get moving. This may be all well-intended, but have we put forth a positive message about leading a different life? I'm not so sure.
Belonging To A Group
I find the way to reach my kids, employees, supervisors and friends is to appeal to each on a personal level. A good example was recently in Cleveland, where some churches, once considered staples of the community, were to be closed by the Catholic Diocese, as monies were nowhere near plentiful enough to support all of the individual parishes. As parishioners banded together to resist these decisions, it was apparent they were truly enjoying the common cause and camaraderie. Most of these churches were in neighborhoods where families grew up together. Men and women who once came to church with their grandparents were now going to church with their grandchildren. The right to have their church remain seemed almost absolute in their minds. There was no wavering, only one over-riding emotion, a sense of entitlement found in belonging. "This is mine and you cannot take it from me. These people, this neighborhood, this experience, this feeling--it's mine and I belong here."
