Photo Credit: Can Stock Photo Inc. / Vicheslav
Last summer, my family was on vacation with another family, and in the midst of playing paddle ball on the beach, our friend’s 8-year-old daughter exclaimed, “Practice makes pretty good.” At the time, I remember thinking that was a cute alternative to the phrase we all grew up hearing. However, the more I’ve thought about it, the more I think there is a critical lesson to be gleaned for all of us who work with young people.
Science Lesson
It is fairly common knowledge that children hear just about everything said around them. We’ve all probably wished in hindsight we hadn’t said something after hearing little voices repeating our words. Our language and specifically our attributions and value judgments have a profound impact in shaping children’s impressions of themselves and their world.
Researchers, such as the psychologist Carol Dweck, have studied and written extensively about the power and danger of words (and specifically praise). It is human nature to fall back on the familiar and known, and individuals tend to nurture and guide youth in the same way they were raised and nurtured. This fact, despite generally good intentions, often leads caring and committed professionals to say and do things that can have an adverse impact on development.